so she asking me "is it okay to have dangling labias?"
Maybe if you date her you can take a dump on her
I'm pretty sure the only race ive ever won was to my mothers egg
Dude just bought condoms some sad fuck next to me buying a pregnancy test he gave me a look like he'd pay me millions to switch places
Can you come over to my place and make up for the crap you called sex yesterday?
Good morning to you
I swear to god he's a one man village people.
I think I just agreed to be an escort for an Asian guy who's gonna be in the city next weekend before he moves back to Shanghai...
I'm pretty sure getting a blow job behind a bar in Rome while her little sister is throwing up in a dumpster not 5 feet away, gives entirely new meaning to the phrase "When in Rome"
I just wanna be craddled in his arms and spoon fed applesauce..
that's the most romantic thing you've ever said.
Told some guy to hold your weave while you "tried" to kick his girlfriends ass...
My vagina is screaming your name . Wtf did you do to it
Our sibling relationship has really blossomed into a wonderful mutual acceptance of sluttyness
He said it only counts if it ends up on the internet
STOP SENDING ME NAKED PICTURES WHEN I'M TRYING TO TEACH. MONDAY TUESDAY 1-3 IS A DICK AND ARSE FREE ZONE
We should get drunk in walmart
when?
20 minutes ago
Randomize
