She rubs her butt on the bed & then she growls..
I woke up naked by my window. blinds open. smiley face drawn on my window.
i may or may not have just grinded on your dog thinking it was my boyfriend
please explain to me why there is a shopping cart in my living room.
I'm hoping to finish this bottle of wine before I pass out, I don't want the remainder spilling on my white down comforter.
I think mom knows I'm drunk I put a full blown balloon in the fridge.
she did 8 shots of vodka. THROUGH A SIPPY STRAW
I have got to meet this girl.
Last thing i remember is pounding jager and puking in that nerds george foreman grill. Then i wake up this morning with some random tooth brush in my mouth
Im the proud new owner of the campus speed bump sign
Come on down you're the next contestant on "lets go drinking!"
I'm gonna get drunk in the shower and yell at my parents during dinner. Have fun in Texas.
No it'll be my boobs and the luge part will be from my nipples. Everyone will be sucking beer from my perfectly sculpted and partially melted tits.
Most of my life can be described like an HBO prison drama.
I ate her out and told her she tasted like pumpkin pie. She screamed that she hated pumpkins and started to cry
We made a blanket fort in my dorm room and fucked in it. Twice. I'm in love.
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