i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
Went to mcdonalds... Wishing I could throw up the last 20 hours of my life.
So Ive been fucking her for the past couple months and i just found our that my grandfather and her grandmother were fuck buddies for a while. I feel like this is a new awesome family tradition that skips a generation.
I seriously just washed my dick in a public restroom. That's how dirty last night got
Either I'm losing my touch or ED is running rampant in 20 something men now
I don't care how high you are, you can't finger me while eating potato chips.
There were slices of bread pasted to the wall with peanut butter this morning. I don't want to know
he is like the poster child for std's. god i hope he meets a girl with teeth in her vag. that would serve him right
I'm glad I booty called you last night. It was nice to see you and talk, in between all the sex...
A big dick and how quickly they respond to snapchat is all I look for in a guy
Just took a piss in some random bushes in a traffic jam and had to sprint back to the car. I'm a boss.
Some guy in the bathroom just took his shirt off and proceeded to tell me the story behind all of his stab wounds. That's what I get for making small talk
Well I'm a full service fuck buddy so lemme know if I can get you food or water or anything
1. so the new neighbor u called dibs on.. I'm sorry..but not really. 2. She lactates, I guess that happens when you have a kid less then 5 months ago.... WTF!! 3. Is it fucked up I'm craving Ceral & Milk now?
Unintionally got shitfaced at study group this week. The waitress brought out a fishbowl of long Island iced tea. Challenge accepted.
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