Hello, balls-out mistake. It's been a while.
I may be a little high but I'm pretty sure my alphabet soup has only Os in it
We call that spaghetti Os
he believed the zit on my nose was a piercing...until he tried to bite it. needless to say he didnt ask for my number
i dont mean to point any fingers but there is a lot of urine in the kitchen
i dont care if i had to wear a dress to fuck her, she was super hot and i stand by my decision
Exactly how does jacking off in my purse count as a 'early christmas present'?
Underwear, t-shirt, bottle of Pinot Grigio and Golden Girls. I've hit a new level of homosexual.
I have a pocket in my purse that is just for condoms and cocktail swords. I feel like that speaks volumes about me as a person
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
I wore granny panties last night to ensure I didn't sleep with him. He said they made me seem more mature. I need a new plan
I'll answer your question with a question: Are you gonna be too high?
Well we were going to compare notes, but all I could remember was throwing up, and all she could remember was kissing, so then we decided to not compare anything.
I'm driving home wearing one sock, boxers, and a tee shirt. That's how good it was
Nothing like a little chlamydia diagnosis to ring in the new year
I would like to make it known to all of you that my penis is official retired, but it thanks you for the countless years of service you provided
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