So you coming over for some grilled cheese and head?
walkin home..,.jsut saw the cheshire cat
watch out for the queen of hearts
fuucck i forgot ab her
She made fun of how I walked so I announced to her boyfriend that I have cum on her face before.
Anyone who says sunshine brings happyness has never woken up with the worst hangover of their life to their window being open and it being a bright shinny day
Wine smoothie.... Not as good as I thought it would be
Imagine a baby lion feeding on an injured gazelle and it tasting fresh blood for the first time. That's me and this breakfast sammich
And there I was, sitting Indian style on the kitchen floor, my fingers covered in peanut butter.
This girl can open a bottle without using her hands and she's 21. She meets my standards
Just woke up with my keys in one hand and cheesecake in the other.
We eventually had to ration the melon vodka. 10 pushups per shot. THATS why my arms hurt
He kissed my hand AND my forehead. I don't think this virginity business is for heartless whores like us.
Know what I do when I'm in that mood? Whenever anyone talks to me I just hiss like a cat. They go away.
No, it's ok. He's Greek. To him I'm just a light drinker, not an alcoholic.
So i walked around campus drunk and alone last night eating pizza and a lunchable from 7-11. Sat by the flag pole and drank an entire liter of water, took off my shoes to prance around in the fountain, then stepped in dog shit on the way home...barefoot.
I could hear it slapping against his thighs under the robe!!!!!!!!! You are a lucky girl!
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