..Thats also how I think I got the lyrics from MIAs Paper Planes Sharpeed on my ass? Maybe.
i just google searched "what time does taco bell open"
when your hometown is famous for abortion clinic bombings, hurricanes, and jude law's newest bastard, its probably time to move.
was stoked on phone sex until he started reciting lines from star wars
so the time management class we had to take for work seems to be working. I just beat off instead of waiting for gf to get home bc it fit my schedule better.
he puked in his toast at dennys. after snoopdogg high fived him. couldn't be prouder to be his bro in law.
I mean, there was frosting being put on a tunafish sandwich. Pretty sure she knew we were high.
idk whats worse playing power hour to yourself, or the fact that you were having fun while doing it
please come over and have sex with me so we can talk about prom and kill 2 birds with one condom
You convinced us both to take shots of jack Daniels through our eyes.
Dude, you were dipping oreos in vodka and asking people to try it, "It's so good!"
I still don't like him. I'm also filled with alcohol, so I'll revisit the statement in the morning.
I figured you were on something. You're way too happy right now to be sober
All I remember thinking is, why the fuck are there martians on the ceiling? And they were riding fruit. Like strawberries and shit.
It's like the perfect sandwich, once you find it you want to ensure your future access to it.
Randomize
