Will you Wikipedia Vin Diesel? Is he gay? It's important...
just saw my sister at the strip club... dont think she's "taking a night class over the summer"
LA Sucks. The only way i can get laid is if i tell people im at a law firm that represent film producers.
And when they figure it out, they act like IM shallow.
i realized boys travel in groups of 3's and girls travel in 4's..thats why it gets so tricky
like hot dogs and buns.
Update- I sold my hat to some drunk kid for 50 bucks. I used my earnings to buy beer on the way home. I realize to everyone else seeing me drinking on my balcony at 6am, I look like an alcoholic, but I'm thinking of it as a night cap
Dude, that was like bongs ago.
So did I or did I not flash an entire concert last night?
In other news I may have fractured my masturbating arm
At least it wasn't your drinking arm
I just want to trick people into going on dates with me so they can bring back to their houses and let me use their wifi.
I vaguely remember us chasing shots by licking each other's faces last night. Our friendship has reached another level completely.
I joined the mile high club last night. I ran a mile while high on coke. It was glorious
Someone somewhere has a picture of me vomiting in a bus stop trash can while a drag queen held my hair for me.
Pride claims another victim
I never truly understood the phrase ball is life until I started having to balance NBA finals and all these men with balls i'd like to handle.
I took out a life ins. policy Thursday. It's okay I can die in Nashville now.
I don't want to be flamboyant (says the guy who bought a hot pink suit to be a flamingo for Halloween)--but I don't mind being a little extra.
Randomize
