I wanna crawl in your skin and have dreams about Bobby Kennedy tonight.
i swear i just saw perry the platypus. the fuck dude. i shouldnt even know who that is
I plan on gettn treatment center drunk
Just wanna let u know that we are almost on the pity blow job level of our friendship.
I'm not sure, 7-8, the last bit was a rush of at least three blended together. Basically you fucked me so stupid that I can't even recall the number of orgasms.
So you know, I'm making that my facebook status.
My goal of the day is to not shit myself. That's it. Setting the bar real low
At some point I'd like to figure out how the weird kid from sociology ended up on my couch naked hugging what appears to be some sort of clothing....seriously it's creeping me out
Did you get any last night. I need to track my forever aloneness
I won the booty shaking contest by mooning the whole bar
Ah well. Drinking wouldn't be drinking without mystery bruises
Agreed.
Just gave my thesis presentation, pretty sure I made out with the admissions woman last night.
Can I tell you that I just incorporated the spice girls in my sexting and you not judge me
Not at all! I'll let your potential employer know you have a huge dick
I'm actually glad the whole thing's over now. It's exhausting to fake a pregnancy.
Imagine not having to fake it.
Yeah, I should never have kids, probably.
He's UNCIRCUMCISED. And it curves. Two things I've never encountered in all my sluttiness and they're both on the hottest guy alive. :(
Randomize
