Yep, it's a dick on our front door. Intentional?
So you started off by saying "no homo," but patting his crotch and saying his jeans fit him wonderfully may have overshadowed that.
i called my mom using *69 and said this was the principal and Matt has a snow a day today. she believed me.
Hey guys, just to let you know, I have a boyfriend...so that hookup was kind of a one time thing.
was that a mass text??
I'm actually agreeing with glenn beck. What the FUCK was in that margarita?!
you woulda been proud of me tonight though. i only made out with 2 guys. and in my defense one of them was to get a job after graduation.
the coastal evacuation route ends at my vagina so you can just skip the bullshit and come over
TAing a class of 300 froshies and being so hungover I forgot a bra is my way of making dreams come true.
Just got a voicemail from a guy referring tp himself "as chest hair guy". If I'm coming home to a intervention I understand.
I forgot to tell you, the medics put you in a wheel chair. ( I kept telling you to cat daddy) oh you also gave everyone high fives for speaking English.
I would recommend NOT getting ass enhancement shots.
I'll call it a tollerance break and either will be celebrating my new job with a bowl or will be smoking my sadness away from not getting the job. Either way.
Mike fell asleep with his hand down my pants. I'm clearly an enticing person.
Can you pay somone's bail with a credit card or just cash? I feel like you would know this.
I just want a man in my bed on a regular basis, who cuddles, and who I can also occasionally hang out with outside of my bedroom. Is that too much to ask for?
Randomize
