is it bad if i hope guys are like edward cullen and can read my mind. i could be a whore in disguise.
kyle and i were puking, simultaneously, off the front porch at 4 am, and in the middle of it he looks up, reaches his hand over, and says "knucks." And then I proceeded to fist bump him. By farrr the best time I've ever had puking.
He told me he wanted to break up so he could get "closer to God."
Does God suck his dick?
So I have some interesting news. The pizza guy called the cops on me...
you might as well be a hobo. you were covered in pee last night hanging out on the stairs drunk.
right. well we all have our lows.
That's the kind of break up sex that keeps couples together. Damn.
They're tearing apart the house I lost my virginity in:(
It was a taxi full of fist pumps and chanting to "face down, ass up". It was that 1% that makes my job worth it.
I need a costume
Dude just wear a bra or something hahaha
I am at a new level of appreciation for drunk-you, who threw up into her own sweatshirt pocket last night in the car. Brava.
It took years to build this empire of casual fuckings and not carings.
Went home with a male stripper who looked like Justin Timberlake.. I started singing cry me a river mid sex. When he sang along I fell in love
Everyone is coupling up and I'm just excited the bartender gives me enough attention to order more shots.
Whoever put the life size cut out of Snoop Dog next to me in bed understands me.
Totally writing my paper on the toilet. Makes me miss you.
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