my math professor just wrote "parallel" on the board, but spelled it "pararrel". guess what country he's from
hanging on that rope, lady gaga looks exactly like a used tampon
all i know is that if they can hide that much blood in her outfit, they definitely could have hid a penis
If you liked it then you shoulda put your dick in it, oh uh uh oh
just spent about 3 1/2 hours looking for a dollar so I can buy weed.
suggestion: become a stripper.
next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
Note to self glow in the dark nail polish can be quite the mood killer during sex especially when you notice its working for the first time and you stop everything your doing to do spirit fingers
Was it a good night or a bad night when you have to apologize to someone the next day for trying to fuck them with a turtle?
If I die tonight and was cremated, you could probably get high off the smoke.
i think she just faxed a picture of her vag from the office copy machine... i mean what kind of sexting is that... wait is that even legal???
So did you grab that log full of poison ivy for the fire and then apparently take a piss on Saturday night too or was that just me?
will we ever learn or are we destined for a life of poison ivy covered balls?
Pre-chapter meeting quote: "Why is there a bun literally taped to the shelf? That doesn't even make sense when you're drunk, who does that?"
I guess I'm just gonna have to learn to live with the fact that I'm the guy who takes his pants off at the party and tries to start an orgy
Sometimes the gods of alcohol choose to take you on a mysterious journey and you just have to go with it
Didn't want to waste the cheese dust from the white cheddar popcorn, so I gave him a handjob, followed by the most delicious blowjob ever. Win-win.
Do dollar stores sell vibrators?
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