Tell me why I go to the dollar store for nail polish remover and a ghetto black dude trys to hit on me in the parking lot, then he gets in line behind me with a dousche bag literally and that is his only purchase.
last night this guy was hitting on me by showing me the famous people he had in his contacts on his cell... when he asked me if i knew lindsay lohan, i said "whose that? sounds asian"
You drank almost the entire bottle of everclear and wanted to walk around. I guess your best friends sister is a cop and you wanted her to arrest you like the lil wayne song.... so sorry dude.
she just announced that once she was paid to deep throat a light saber with a mint flavored condom on it. i'm speechless.
Well you broke that rule when you put it in your mouth.
Clearly that person doesn't understand how efficient getting drunk and working out at the same time is.
I'll do a soapy photo shoot for you in the shower. No loofas, though. Once you get one of those caught in your nipple ring, you never go back.
Seriously, I want to give you a plaque thanking you for your dedicated service to my vagina.
Letting two friends screw at my place in exchange for weed. This is my life.
She really has to stop the coke at some point. Won't she run out of money eventually?
Won't she run out of nose eventually?
I feel like at this point in my life I should be dating someone who doesn't run out of all his money on Mondays and have to wait til fridy to buy his weed
He was telling me about how he's leaving on his Mission next week... While we were having sex in the back of his car.
REMEBER. We are young, horny, and poor. If someone wants to give us alcohol... TAKE. IT.
I 100% barfed while bumping the DMX remix of reading rainbow
Sitting beside a stoned cat on the kitchen floor eating cheesecake with my hands...just a struggle
Randomize
