Fuck u you updated twitter but didn't answer my text
I know you're alive
He muttered something about having just washed he sheets, then demanded I give him all my quarters.
was i over the top when i said that i wished they made v-neck pants to her?
FUCK TREES I CLIMB BUOYS MOTHERFUCKER
STOP listening to that song
we're on our way back. she tried to pants the waiter again.
I need the number of a restaurant that delivers, has lock-picking abilities, and is okay with full frontal male nudity. Entirely too hungover to get out of bed.
No. If you are gonna end this, you are gonna do it right. Not by getting bombed and falling on a strange penis. That was the old you.
SORRY! Pervert came out for a bit. BAD PERVERT! BACK IN YOUR HOME!
Being with her was like shitty sexual fear factor big ass sausage nipples over sized outty belly button i was scared and drunk tell know one
I'm going to start referring to my liver is Livy. I feel like if I give it an affectionate nickname it will hate me less. Livy isn't ready for syllabus week.
I think we all know your liver needs a man's name.
I got my eyebrow ring humped out. How is that even possible?
you said you wanted to call me grandma and give me hugs
Lol for real, I'm Kylie Jenner "this is my year of realizing things" right now
He's completely obsessed with his ex but gives phenomenal head. So overall, yeah, good first date.
Well the hawks lost... so, of course, the only logical course of action was a bonfire in the middle of the street.
Randomize
