I am pretty sure the guy in the stall two dwn from me is jerking it...seriously
It's Friday. Sex?
I was so high i believed someone when they told me le moyne beat syracuse
I'm gonna get drunk and through up on the first happy couple I see.
My mom walked down and caught me drinking by myself, watching the nanny at 3:30AM. I had no idea what to say
Is she bent over a couch yet or did daylight savings time throw off her usual schedule?
Sorry for making you give strangers a ride for hits of acid.
it wasn't until he got that douchey haircut that i started regretting sleeping with him
There was probably a tattoo above her soulless vagina that read 'it's a trap!' Yet you ignored it
I heard them banging and it sounded like he was trying to stuff a fucking coconut into her
the fact that you have a guy named the "i want you to tie me up and fuck me" guy speaks volumes about your life.
He does have a nice smile. I also like to think he has a nice penis, but that's just a prediction.
You know it's time to call it a night when every guy in the bar (all 3 of them) have seen you naked at one time or another.
So, were you planning on telling me you left your panties in my glovebox??
Came up to an intersection and someone was blasting My Chemical Romance at like 9 AM. They're DEFINITELY having a good day
Randomize
