If I remember taking any of my finals after tomorrow night, it will not have been a successful night.
At Grandmas for dinner. She is drinking a smirnoff ice. As soon as I saw it I had to stop myself from yelling chug.
I don't remember much, but my night is dated pre-Jaeger and post-Jaeger. Also, my boss may or may not have tucked me in.
You are very nonchalant about the high probability of us having an orgy.
Eh, I'm ok with this, this can work. We're the best kind of the worst people.
work has become about six times more interesting since i started fucking my boss.
If the egyptians can build pryamids men can walk on the moon and ron jeremy can sleep with all those bitches then we can finish these three handles of vodka
I took your mattress from your bed. Don't ask questions. Love you. See ya later.
I blew him while the canoe was sinking...I think of it as the better version of the titanic
after sex he fell asleep with his water bottle in one hand and his dick in the other at 6pm. I'm a winner.
You've changed since you got that strap on
I slept on her porch...in her dads handcuffs
Is Facebook telling the truth about your nipples?!
you're the only girl i know who can be too sick to walk to the kitchen and still have enough game to receive multiple orgasms
I s2g I’m about to get ghosted by a 34 yr old and my Oedipus complex cannot take it
you started putting peanut butter on your pubes.
Randomize
