So i just bought beer on a credit card, using a fake ID, while wearing my nametag from work. All 3 have different names on them. God i love my boobs.
Opportunity cost of getting to econ after a night on the town > marginal benefit of attending class
so high i just made my own version of grilled cheese using toast and spray cheese
here comes the puke
I'd appreciated it if you didn't lick my boyfriends face again. I'm askin nicely. Thank you.
I woke up to his gay cousin telling me I had the prettiest boobs. I don't even wanna know.
Sorry for screaming that you were an apple in spanish at the bar last night, that was the wine talking
can anyone on this campus do anything sober?
there's a photo set of like seven dicks covered in glitter....i don't know what to do
Take a good hard look at your life. And the number of 18-20 year olds that you have made out with in the last 6 months... and then keep doing whatever the fuck you want.
Made my roommate send me tit pics so I could send them to someone because I didn't want to move.
All I've done today is make sangria and wonder what the hell I'm doing with my life.
i feel sensations at the ends of my beard. Either I am super high. Or my face has accepted my beard and I completed my transformation to Mecca
HE WILL NEVER BE ONE OF US. HE WILL NEVER BE A DECENT, GOD-FEARING WHORE.
I'm over here trying to figure out how to get shake shack delivered to my bed and Jamie is having a child
I can't decide if I miss drinking or you, they are so closely connected.
Randomize
