is it bad that i shorted Freddie Mac immediatly after I heard about the CFO?
It's like the Sean Connery of vaginas. You don't mess with it.
I just smoked a bowl while riding a horse. This has been a productive vacation.
I'm about to tackle a 10 year old off a sea doo
no i decided against it. savin my coke binge for finals week.
She shouted out halfway through "that costume does nothing to hide your cock". Last time we let her drink at the theatre.
The usual, bring face make up, I have a weird gash on my nose, probably from my one night stand
Man, I thought my dick was gonna fall off.
Dude, I didn't even think they made slap bracelets anymore. You okay?
I thought she was being abused so tried to go in at the sympathy angle, but the bruises were from pole dancing. I went in at all angles.
btw theres a pine tree in the downstairs shower. the guys thought it would be a great free air freshener.
I was talking about you wanting my dick, but that works too
Excuse me while I download incredibly disturbing porn until I'm more ashamed of myself than of my country.
BOOTY CALL IN EFFECT, BOOTY CALL IN PROCESS, BOOTY CALL ACCEPTED, AND BOOTY CALL INITIATES FRIDAY NIGHT.
then he told me my boobs feel like "if you put mushroom soup in a baggie." I don't know how I'm supposed to feel about this.
just blew him in the library. I am a classy dame
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