ha- omfg whatt the fuck is wrong w me. Alcohol+third cousins= bad decisions
clearly I should have checked to see if he was an NRA member before I went back to his house and woke up in Heston's haven.
3rd rule of buttsex she must be clean and shower recently
and skipped dinner
That's why she's the girl with her life together and you're the girl with the penis drawn on your car.
it tasted disgusting. but i pretty much drank it in the name of science, and free alcohol
Recent Google searches: "babu kangarooz"... "why 2 tacos bell" and "is dinosaur in real life"
Hurricane Sex Time is the only thing iv said since it started.
I'm out of mixers so I am using sugar water. Times are tough.
I've decided I want to blow you wearing a santa hat.
Aren't rabbit ears more seasonally appropriate?
I look like one classy bitch running in heels through my backyard while carrying a small dog and a large bottle of booze. How am I still single?
Seems like you've kicked summer 2012 off well.
I just put fruit snacks in my sangria instead of real fruit. Its like freshman year all over again..
We couldn't afford sangria freshman year. We're lucky we had fruit snacks..
He stopped responding after the animal pictures... I do this EVERY TIME.
Hey my dad gave me life the least I can do is take him chicken strips and a pack of marlboros.
Dennis picked up a 50 year old woman. Then he and Dan got in a fight and jumped out of the limo. No one knows what happened to them.
Omfg I just White Claw shamed a Girl Scout Cookie mom and I feel SO BAD.
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