Rosebud was a fucking sled. Gay.
Dibs on passing out in front of the toilet.
He played with my vagina like it was a turntable
you kept slapshing your drinks on people saying the power of christ compels you.
I just saw on the news, this guy tried to smuggle coke in a bouquet of roses... and to think I used to hate valentines day.
What I wanna know is who took a picture eiffel towering her?
She's popping painkillers like they're tic tacs and singing the soundtrack to dreamgirls. It's you're turn to babysit her.
Do not deep throat a rocket pop, it WILL go into your lungs, and you may die.
Bring fortys. we have the duct tape. its onnn mothafuckaaaa
There are a bunch of highly educated, advanced in their field, PUSSY ASS BITCHES in this bar
You told me my blanket felt like ground beef.
We just taught the Brazilian how to smoke out of a vuvuzela.
going on a mission to find my pants and the guy who stole my beer don't wait up
I got so drunk I thought my tennis court was a corn field so I laid in it and ate pizza
I lost my cyber virginity to a guy I barely knew in high school while a Togepi Plushie watched.
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