It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
We need to find a way to make penises more like hookahs.
I have to start avoiding pregnant women. This is getting out of hand.
ask if his dick looks like a sausage. alex's bro told me that's a sure sign. btw took pain pills. maybe shouldn't listen to me.
Ramen noodles and uncensored jerry springer episodes, what a nice life i have.
how many days can you live off of Vicodin and frosty?? im going on 4 days......
Did we both pass out talking about cake last night?
OMGGG I JUST SAW A REAL OWL JUST CHILLING ON TOP OF A SIGN POST. I WALKED UP TO HIM AND SAID HOO HOOOOO AND HE TURNED HIS HEAD AT ME AND WAS LIKE YEAHHH BRO
I'm remembering the time we thought it was a brilliant idea to put koolaid powder in shots of goldschlager
He's the stereotypical redneck. He tried to go kayaking during a storm and almost got into a fight when a park ranger tried to stop him
She makes margaritas with lemon-lime 5 hour energy..thats brilliant
and you were wondering how she got into Harvard
You need to stop telling people you gained weight over the holidays. You've been fat since July.
Sometimes having a penis is like having a really stupid drunk best friend. You see it doing dumb shit but you're just not the one in charge.
Brother gave me a harry potter philosophy book for xmas we need to get stoned and talk about this.
FINE I guess I'll just drink regular coke like a PLEBIAN.
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