We were done making out and had been asleep for a hour. I felt him put his hand on my butt. Then I farted.
I stayed up for an hour trying to make my room stop spinning and then I realized it was bc my fan was on
i have a dinosaur tramp stamp
My vagina is scared and excited at the same time. It might not be able to sleep tonight.
It's sad the highlight of the night was you didn't electrocute yourself again.
I don't know who the girl crying at my kitchen table eating gravy from the KFC container is, but I feel like she could be my soulmate
casually drinking alone with your cats. do they like sparks?
he slipped a picture of a kangaroo under my door that said "im sorry" on the back and passed out on my lawn.. who the fuck is this kid?
Tis the season to puke in grandma's bathroom
How the hell do you leave a party with a kitten? It's missing and everyone knows it was you.
I did something similar high once. I stopped like 30 feet in front of a stop sign because I felt like it was running towards me and I started crying. Got out my car and hugged it and told it not to run away people need it.
Naked. naked and bneed help.
His roommates are gone so we had sex in every room of the house and watched the wire. What have you done today?
Gave her a puke bucket just in case. She filled the bottom of it with tears. Super sad. Although I am super proud she didn't puke. That was a lot of Fireball.
HIDE THE INFLATABLE PENIS
Randomize
