You surviving the open bar?
Super asto ex polenta omaha botad
I have just two goals for this NYE. 1) get so drunk that every guy looks like Clive Owen 2) make out with as many Clive's as possible.
Plus I'm pretty sure you said "love you" on the phone, so technically I should be putting you on some type of probation
i know i should keep better track of the things that i put in your vagina but i've put so many things in there it's hard to keep track
She finally pulled over after almost hitting 4 cars and a semi and asked me if i was rwady i told her to let my penis to come back out
btw telling the cab driver, that took you to your booty call that is now returning your wallet that you left in his cab, that you want to hug him is awkward
He bought you footie pajamas. Shit's pretty serious.
On a Thurs night I found myself drunk in a limo w 9 dudes on my way to a strip club. Once there I was handed $100 in ones and told "spend it." I need a husband. Or Jesus.
Last night was like blooper reel sex. He dropped me!!
So, I'm either with my future life partner or my future life taker. And his brother. lol. I'll let you know when I get home alive.
Good luck. While you're suffocating on a dick, I'll be eating pizza rolls. Being a good girl.
It was a "have 911 on speed dial" kinda night
Pretty sure I got at least one girl to question her sexuality at the Christmas party last night
Had a very good bday. Have the teeth marks and bruises to prove it
You're a FUCKING ASSHOLE. Love mom
Randomize
