Third unemployed latin in my bed this week. I'm on a roll
I found a girl on our couch wearing lederhosen this mornig... I dont know if i should be impressed or ashamed
theres always time to masturbate. my grandpa taught me that.
I think he's on the stoner protein diet. I just saw him, at 3 am, spreading mayo on a slice of deli ham and sprinkling salt on top.
I get credit on the assist, you can thank me by taking a pic of her ass under the covers and sending it to me. It would make my YEAR
We need to reprogram your vagina to say "no"
God she is annoying. I am only keeping her around on fb because I want to see if her baby comes out looking like an alien or not.
My hope for you over spring break is that you can be some disease free girl's random spring break mistake.
Also, I'm sat on the floor drinking cava because life is just not working for me tonight.
Ack! That is the first dick pic I've ever received. A) congrats B) that is way grosser than I ever thought t would be.
Whatever she smells like compost and feathers.
I believe they call that patchouli.
Gay bathhouses. They're actually a thing. So god does exist. And he doesn't hate me as much as you think he does
I walked into my house with my pants inside out, no shoes and a limp. My mom asked me if I had fun but I passed out before I could reply...
I vomited out my contact lenses last night
Hey! you should come over!
Who is this? The number is saved as "Sexy Awesome"
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