Rosebud was a fucking sled. Gay.
My vag wants to play a game of hungry hungry hippos with your cock.
I didn't want to talk to him so I just started telling him how important Jesus was to me
Grown men dancing to Spice Girls and a girl wearing one shoe. I belong here
Just smoked a bowl with the exterminator. I think my day is more productive.
I mean we've tried to get high on nutmeg, we clearly dont know the definition of "too far"
I tried to fuck this guy who I'm pretty sure has an erectile dysfunction
There's nothing like sitting directly behind someone you fucked 5 years ago at church on Easter Sunday
shes still here... layin in my bed watching a beyonce concert on tv drinking leftover franzia straight outta the bag and crying
Just please never masturbate in my bed again. I'm burning my sheets as I write this.
Other than my penis smelling like an ashtray, it went really well.
Well while you were being a dick I was taping back together a cougars broken heart
Walking down the street, Bro bumping to 'still' by dre. Dropped his trash on the ground and aggressively sped up when his light turned green. If you still had love for the streets you wouldn't of fucking littered. Took everything for me not to yell at him. I know you would've.
Woke up in a cemetery. Puked in front a funeral ceremony that was going on.
I'm like a saiyan, every time I get trashed I come back stronger
Randomize
