Just heard "Kiss Me Though the Phone" for the first time. Amazed how it took Soulja Boy two songs to become a shitter version of Ja Rule.
dont touch anything in my room. If its phallus shaped, i can almost guarantee its been in my vagina.
He told me I took off my shirt, asked for the latino thunder and jumped on him. I want to question this but it sounds too much like me.
I sent him a pic of my tits.. All he said was, "oh your sun burn"
also: i found my "nug jug", actually the baby did, but either way it got returned to its rightful owner
Asking him not to sleep with other girls is like asking me not to have my period apparently
I'm not drinking anymore...and by that, I mean until St. Patrick's Day.
Finals week...the biggest cock block since your brother threatened me with a beer bottle at the bar.
Returning my drunken purchases from last night. Not a single thing I bought was on sale.
His hands kept asking for sex, but all I could think was "dude, this is going to ruin my high".
i got kicked out of McDonald's for demanding a margarita mcflurry
I thought you might think I was an idiot who thought cock rings prevent STDs,
Last night I made out with two lesbians while dancing with another girl. I'm pretty sure it wasn't even real life.
She could hold her breath for a long time. Best underwater blowjob ever.
How’d it go?
I accidentally joined a cult
So not great...
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