He was sucking on my finger.... and it was at that moment that I thought: Man. I wish I had a penis.
I told him we couldn't have sex because I was ovulating and "I come from fertile people."
I am trapped in a bar with french tattooed drug dealers who also blow glass art. Just in case this is bad, know what happened.
Going to.goingto.gtoing to DIE DIE DIEEEE......i feel like everyeone impotrant in my life like MLK is judging me.... saddd day
Ssssssssssshhhhhhhhhhhiiiiiiii!iiiiiiiiiitttttttttttttttssssssssssssshhhhhhhhooooooooowwwwwww. Letters for emphaSSIIISISEEEE!
He pulled out, and the resulting cumstain on my sheets is in the shape of a fetus. The irony of this is both awesome and terrifying.
I could really do without pictures of your asses in my inbox. That said, I'm extremely jealous that I wasn't involved.
I think I'm too tall to 69 successfully.
I think I might cry.
okay when i look at this i can see it on the future news along with the headline "picture scandal involving senatorial candidate sexually harassing drunken idiot in what appears to be a pink room of pain"
Not only did my parents pick me up from his hotel room in the morning, but he also came outside and had a casual little chat with my dad through the driver's side windrow.
You should come over tomorrow. Wine, pizza and my vagina. Those are all great things.
We both shit in the same closet in Santa Fe. Nothing is sacred anymore.
last night you made out with a 19 year old on a bar and i woke up with a swede in my bed. lets just say that never happened.
If you think me talking about that hot guy accepting my LinkedIn request is pornographic, I’m not sure how you’re gonna feel when I tell you I fucked a stranger on a park bench last weekend
I don't wanna SLEEP with him, I want to start bar fights with him. There's a difference.
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