I'm just that much of a man that I can watch Ellen and Oprah back to back and still like girls.
im over her. I got weed and youtube. everything i could ever ask for.
I'm drinking while I write this paper. When I can't see the screen anymore I'm gonna come out
on the way home the dog started throwing up her bone in the car..so naturally i started to puke too
I don't care. I'll be that guy that eats cake in a car. Alone. With the doors locked.
I was trying to be really smart and save 10 dollars for each cab there and back. ...so I ripped a $20 dollar bill in half.
I think I reached optimum potential when I summersaulted straight into a kiddie pool.
No, earlier you attempted Jenga with everyones shoes.
... They left for 10 minutes and came back with a lobster he's in the toilet downstairs
Oh you know, watching its always sunny and petting his cat and NOT fucking. I'm starting my whorefree 2012 resolution early.
Btw I'm currently writing a paper in a beer garden. Be proud.
So Doritos and vodka was obviously not as good an idea as I thought at the time.
I think after tonight I'm 85% lesbian
Taking body shots off hot Camren. Get here now.
These business classes have improved my drug business ten fold
Well, for starters, you were growling and slurping beer from a puddle on the carpet. Let's all hope that was beer...
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