420 ftw
There are just some things I refuse to put in my mouth.
took him home. told him i would rock his world. passed out. a for effort f for follow thru
you kept telling everyone that you were the mayor of silverware town
Baconater + red wine = first meal of the day
"Hung over, tired and having a faint scent of some body butter and random pieces of glitter from a girl named gigi, almost arrested in drug bust, $40 Canadian in my pocket and all i got was this lousy Tshirt" shirts dont exist, but they need to
she refused to get out of the dog cage till we sang "be our guest" to her.
This weekend is gunna be a fucking shitshow. I don't even wanna know how many dicks will end up inside of me
I think he is probably a psycho that will eventually murder me but i mean the sex last time was AWESOME.
Last night I went to spank her while she was riding me and sack-tapped myself.
I just want to braid flowers into his hair and steal all of his pills.
You've been dating this guy for a month now and as your best friend I have to complain that I still don't how big his dick is.
No way hahaha I have zero intention of adding him I wanna just join in on a three some but mostly just be there for moral support and snacks
...I just added shower water to my vodka on ice\n#sendhelp
You thought the flashing lights were strobe lights when they were loading you into the ambulance. You asked the EMT if he had any X.
Randomize
