I cant talk right now they are about to fuck again
I may have pooped in your shoe. or somewhere else in your closet. its unclear.
I woke up from my nap, looked out my window, and saw about bout 6 people get tasered in less than 20 seconds.....could someone please tell me what's going on.
I have hooked up with someone in EVERYONE OF MY CLASSES.
That's how you know you deserve to be a senior
Wait til she sees the pic of her vag in court docs.
370HSSV 0773H read that upside down
what are you doing with your life
He gave me a hug and said "He doesn't deserve you, Anna. Your boobs are great, and I'd fuck you anytime. Any. Place." I need a new 'gay' friend.
Alright dude i'm gonna go to go sleep off this soberness. my life is a cosmic joke
I just realized, I'm going to be on my period for the end of the world. FUCK.
I was fed cake in bed and then was pinned down and ridden till I came. And then fed more cake. I'm going to marry Brad. I'll put money on it.
I joined the mile high club last night. I ran a mile while high on coke. It was glorious
i don't think fitbit tracks "flipping the fuck out" as activity.
Full body rubs, head scratches, foot rubs, massages, a penis that is able to get hard whenever you want it. I mean ive got a lot to offer
I had a threesome last night with my fiance' and our soon to be best man. Everyone is surprisingly chill about it this morning. Is this any indication of what the wedding night will be like?
I currently hiding in an upside down garbage can please come find me
Randomize
