i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
I dk what to do with this kid he is like legitimately interested in my life.
i hate always having to make my eye shadow look really good since my eyes always end up closed by the end of the night in pics
Congrats to the girl that left her positive preggo test in the bathroom...
I worked with a girl tonight that recognized me solely from a keg stand she witnessed me do sophmore year. Needless to say this made my night
Pre-game strategy: play thunder by yourself in the shower. Surprisingly, success.
He walked into the bar right as I was licking the shotglass clean. We made eye contact for way too long..
As I am reading this. I'm standing in my underwear eating taquitos. I'm saying this in the most loving way possible: FUCK OFF.
Nothing says happy gameday like waking up in only an ACC Championship shirt in the qb's bed with a different football player
My boobs are numb because I've been using them as stress balls
"I wonder if vinegar is some sort of magical hangover cure" "...no I was definitely still drunk and drinking vinegar because I was thirsty"
I hate him but I love him for what he does which is me
He showed up with a hearse full of beer and is currently shooting pumpkins with a flare gun. Who gives a shit if he's a furry. We need to party with him more often.
I was just seen throwin up on the bookstore building near a trashcan by parents. Naturally I throw a thumbs up and say go college
Bro, I live in a constant state of existential dread and moderate ennui. The prospect of cosmic horror doesn’t faze me that much.
Randomize
