I just made a milkshake without a blender... thats determination
I had a new years resolution not to be a whore anymore, but I think I'm gonna wait till 2011
The way I see it, if i don't fail the midterm and blow off some of the projects, how else am I going to get motivated to study for the final ?
She just got in car wreck. Wreck sex is better than break up sex
Well, that's a 3 inch weight lifted off of my vagina
I held a cracker & gaterade down for an hour. I feel like this will be my greatest accomplishment of the day.
I'm getting flash backs of last night. They're coming in song form.
Idk every story shes told me thats started with "back when i was a lesbian" has been my new favorite story
he got all sad that i was going to fuck his roommate, so i just asked him if it would make him feel better if I let him motor boat me. i am such a saint.
Unless you're gonna start buying my underwear, you have got to stop ripping it off of me.
I really hope you didn't eat the bowl of melted vanilla ice cream I left on the coffee table. Because it is not melted vanilla ice cream.
Go christen that room with your naked body.
Today was brought to you by the letter B for beer and bourbon and the number fuck you I'm meant to be studying not hungover
And a hot pocket after we fucked. Heaven.
The Adderall says yes, but my body says no.
Randomize
