I want someone to please me without me having to show him steps 1 through 5
Can you imagine it being physically possible any other way unless the cows are unnaturally flexible
What kind of person begs for a BJ from someone who just got their wisdom teeth out?
your philanthropy is ruining my sex life.
You missed lesbians having sex in the bathroom and the whole bar clapping for them. I had to do recon. It was amazing
Jusy read on a science page that squeezing boobs can prevent cancer cells from forming in them, youre welcome.
When you are old and getting humped by saggy balls every other weekend you are gonna wish you had more sex with freshly legal boys. Your vagina will thank you one day. Don't let her down.
We hooked up and then we watched game of thrones while he fed me chocolate. I don't see how our benafriendship is a bad thing.
Officially crunch time. It's my last year of grad school and I've yet to get blown in a school library. The parking garage was less than a block away though.
Glow Paint looked great for the Black Light Party last night, Tonight having a glow in the dark Pizza on my arm, not so much.
I yelled "NO FLEX ZONE!!!" at the guy that thinks it's cool to take off his shirt at the party then proceeded to puking
If I were better looking, this would be the point where I'd resign myself to stripping.
Take home message: SPERM IS EVIL AND SHOULD NEVER EVER EVER BE ALLOWED UP ONE'S NOSE.
That is our entire relationship. We match bowls and give each other head. What more could you possibly want?
Put the lady boner away. He's engaged. To my brother. No, life is not fair.
Randomize
