what do 4 police cars, 1 ambulence, and 2 fire truycks have in common?.... My driveway
I was so high I couldnt even listen to music i was terrified of the potential knowledge i would gain.
when i spit it made a heart shape. i think it's a sign
He literally is quoting that 21 questions song, the 50 cent one. oh my god.
BTW waking up to a picture of you taking a shot of what I can only assume was shitty lukewarm liquor out of a blow up dolls butt made my day
In the midst of you puking your guts out, you stopped, looked at the globe in front of you and whispered "America.."
You may be in san diego, but I just watched a guy in a wheelchair sing walking in memphis for karaoke. Check and mate.
What part of drinking with my mom makes you think i'd get naked
All of it
Okay, I just got to our real hotel and the YMCA may have been a better choice. A man w/ no shirt on
I can see the future and your future is full of penis
We were watching sports center while I blew him so we could see the football highlights. I missed fall
theres a canoe in our lawn. we dont own a canoe.
it was the only safe place
I texted him back and I am so nervous I may vomit up all of the soup I just ate.
Did you really think putting a napkin over your head would make you giving him a bj less obvious?
Nate is still in lock up because when the cop informed me he'd shit his pants in the squad car I declined to post bail.
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