He proposed that we "bone". I've completely given up on boys.
she's like bobby knight all she does is scream and point
just got a girls number while on a 5 am adderall cig break this is college at its finest
Legit screaming match in this bar over the differences between cupcakes and muffins.
While I was sneeking out of her apartment, there was a giant cage with a parrot in it. I half expected it to squak "hit and run...hit and run."
You are the tramp this city needs, but not the one it deserves.
i think i just asked a donut if it was ok
I think the "tmi" ship sailed a long time ago, and it took our dignities with it..
Dude she tried to bite my face off last night, literally. I have never actually felt like a piece of meat until that point in life...
That's actually very serious....I really do think of you whenever is see pizza
just put a ruler in a cup trying to measure how much ivve had to drink..... God help me
I love that we can live in a world where I can Google "Harry Potter lizard" and an illustration for my dream pops up
Well I'm trying out this whole "not sleep with a stranger thing"
That's silly... just silly. And by silly I mean unrealistic.
I woke up this morning to pee and six dollar bills fell out of my underwear. I guess that lap dance just bought me lunch.
ya well i woke up to my roommate spraying me with windex...
Randomize
