It's noon and i am somehow drinking by myself in a jazz tent in broad daylight.
I'm so hungover, I actually considered rolling down the stairs to avoid walking.
life just isnt the same w/o real world cancun
Everytime I sleep with him he gives me another hint to what his tattoo means. I'm like a slutty Nancy Drew.
I forgot how wholesome of a place a park is when youre not drinking there.
...if you're living vicariously thought me, that was a great blow job you just gave in the B&N parking lot.
It's a goat... but where the fuck did it come from?
I've decided he is effectively a mouth, hands and cock held together by bad ideas and compliments, and I'm OK with that.
Well I was going to go home but vodka happened.
Time to eat Mexican food til I hate myself.
That's completely alright, I do it a lot.
At leat we can cross off 'having sex in a classroom' on our bucket list.
all of these bad things happened because I didn't bring a shower beer.
Apparently I'm some kind of sexual camel.
When was the last time you got laid?
When was the last time you came home sober?
touche
Ben Franklin would totally be a furry.
You're smoking weed and checking Tumblr I take it?
Randomize
