Do they make some cleansing product for your soul? Like mouthwash that makes you not a skank? Or is that what religions for?
Eh, i think it's called sobriety. But its not fun.
seriously i just wanna be friends
pass
Now I'm watching The History of Sex on the History Channel. They're talking about how repressed the 30s were. I think I understand why grandma is such an angry person.
Wouldn't pinatas filled with coke be awesome idea for cinco de mayo?
I gave myself a pep talk in the library bathroom mirror. and then threw up in the sink.
It's times like this I miss having my nipples pinched
I may, or may not have licked his face in an Applebee's.
why can't I meet attractive men at the places I like to hang out? like books a million. or the liquor store.
Just got discharged from the hospital after getting my finger stitched back together don't you dare say you had a worse night than me
I am the only person I know ever to have been brought TO the bar in the back of a cop a car. Twice.
I couldn't find a lighter, so I smoked a bowl with a birthday candle.
This ice cream is 10x better than the sex I had yesterday
Jamie's fucking a senior citizen and I'm eating chips and salsa in the shower at 2am, so whatever you're doing it can't be worse.
He yanked my breathe right strip off in the middle of me riding him.
ever feel bored AND lazy?
I call it "awake" but yeah...
Randomize
