I was thinking about texting her and telling her I had syphilis when I was with her and that she should get tested. just for shits and giggles. skank dahaha
the smoke from my cigarette strangely resembles what patrick swayzes ghost will look like.
I knew the cheap date at Taco Bell would backfire because it makes even the most pre-cautious girls involuntary fart in public
you left your shoes but remembered to take your vodka. i see where your priorities are.
Welll when you have a beer at 8:30 am you've already decided whaat kind of Sunday it ism
at least you know where his tattoos end, so it wasn't a complete waste of time.
U offered to motor boat her and it somehow turned into u two going on a sunset cruise in Newport. At 3am.
I think the guy I was trying to dance with was an undercover cop...
She shit all over my seat. She is not allowed in my car under any circumstances. Not even with drugs. You can't forgive a shit.
"YOU ALWAYS BEEN A HOE YOU ALWAYS GONE BE A HOE. THAT'S JUST THE WAY IT'S GONE BE." overheard at temple
I just want to braid flowers into his hair and steal all of his pills.
That's actually very serious....I really do think of you whenever is see pizza
So who left their underwear on a lamppost in my aunt's backyard
Soo I'm in the trunk of a car drunk about to jump on trampolines. My life rocks!
He was walking around and kept offering the neighbors flamingo lawn ornaments shots of vodka.
Randomize
