Question. A woman tells her guy she's on birth control. Stops taking it to have a kid to force the guy to be responsible and with her. What rights does that guy have
None he's f-d
This guy sitting next to me just bought a plot of land off the internet. On a whim. In the middle of class
I envy your ability to put any word in front o the word beer and make drinking before 5 sound like a socially sanctioned event.
apparently vodka and oj turns green when you throw it up
basic color theory
I think the waitress doesn't beleive I have friends coming. I've had 4 drinks and a large salad just waiting for you guys.
He just told me that when we were doing it I told him I was the captain and he was the boat. Im too embarassed to ask for money for a cab.
Walking down the street trying to find the pants I had on last night
So ive narrowed my options down to getting food or masturbating. Don't judge me
Its summer. Time to get to the freshmen before the weight does.
Uhm after 8 I don't recall anything. All I know is there's a picture of me playing pong with my grandmother.
I just smoked a bowl with the lady who runs the special olympics. Your move.
Her mom is a nurse who got called in to declare someone dead. Just got wing manned by a corpse.
That's what you get for doing kinky shit with a guy that lives in his moms basement.
The sun is out, the birds are chirping, I made some brownies, I'm not pregnant
This is literally what my 13-year old cousin said to me this morning.
This is bullshit, I shit my pants for the 1st time in 30 years, stuck on the 405, fuck this shit.
Depends
Randomize
