she looked like the bat from fern gully.
Think about all of the events that have led to this: me sitting in the back of my classroom drinking beer out of a taco bell cup, telling the teacher I have to leave early to go to an AA meeting.
My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall?
Sitting next to a girl in the computer cluster who just googled syphilis symtoms, started crying & got up and left. My life suddenly seems better.
You Were screaming "Im trying to get it in" and "stop cock blocking" while i threw you in the car
It involved anal and pop rocks. Tell me how that could have ended well.
Showerbowl immediately followed by pullups naked. I feel like fucking Tarzan
The only alcohol in the house was a bottle of Sherry. It's like cough syrup that I shotgunned off Strawberry Shortcake's ass.
I seriously just caught my Pina colada from falling of a table perfectly facing up. I will now reward myself by finishing this one and then getting my 8th
This election needs to be over, im tired of girls asking who im going to vote for mid hookup
Dude are you being arrested? I swear I just saw you laying on the hood of your car with a cop patting you down...
I am slightly proud of the fact his mom turns on the dryer located behind the spare bedroom EVERY time we visit!
I am in serious pain and you're making dick jokes. I hope you wind up with crotch rot.
Hey mike is locked out, sleeping on the common room couch, no idea where his pants are nor does he know where he is. When you get this let him in? And let me know ur alive too!
He stumbled out of their hotel room and yelled, "I'M ON A STATEWIDE TOUR. I'VE BEEN IN KENTUCKY AND OKLAHOMA."
Randomize
