Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
she kept checking the clock when she was giving me head and at midnight she said she had to stop because she cant eat meat on fridays is that bitch serious
I appreciate the offer. Swallowing pride is much like swallowing cum, difficult and unpleasant
I get credit on the assist, you can thank me by taking a pic of her ass under the covers and sending it to me. It would make my YEAR
I just passed a drug test. I want to shout that from the top of a mountain. Can we have beers on the top of a mountain?
Let's just say I've never been so continually aware of my nipples before.
We smoked a bowl in front of the abortion clinic shouting Obama at the protestors.
There was a trampoline and tequila. It was glorious.
I'm dressed as a caveman and drunk so that's not really an option
She shows up drunk at 3am for sex and then punches me straight in the eye in the middle of it because "you're too nice."
My friend asked me if I got home okay and I replied "Glad teat. Goodnight." Usually I can translate drunk me, but I'm even lost on that one.
the cop said "drunk and disorderly" like it was a bad thing
Yeah, but i got vodka and bacon out of it, so it's fine.
Dick pics just aren’t doing it for me, this bowl of Mac n cheese and Game of Thrones trump you tenfold
You drank whiskey for 9 hours and did not eat anything.Nothing good was going to come from that.
Randomize
