Yep. About to get on pornhub to spill some Christmas cheer
Just made a coke joke and literally drooled on myself. How do we feel about pavlov's theory of conditioning now?
he bit the head off a dead goose for 5 beers. this is my future boyfriend.
I admit it's going to be hard to top a limo orgy and Mcnuggets....but I have faith in you
Dude she has starbursts in her sports bra. I feel like this is counter productive.
I think being an adult is being able to say no to free shots...I need to work on that.
if things do not go as planned you should see me walking down I81 blindfolded and pantless
She just shoved like three McNuggets in her mouth and started sobbing and I have no idea what's going on.
I need to ask my mom where the drain cleaner is, but I'm afraid she'll ask why and the answer to that will just be "cum."
I'm attracted to him because he looks like the kind of guy who would lick my asshole without me having to ask.
I had her buy me a cock ring, so we might test that out. We are presently playing yahtzee.
Cock rings and yahtzee. Like peanut butter and jelly.
I got with him in my watermelon costume so ya you owe me $1
Okay well for one he didn't speak any english but before any happened he made me use the translator to consent
the fact that you beer bonged rum made me so proud, the fact that you threw up an entire footlong tuna melt after... not so much babe
Yah. Then he started clapping my boobs together in his hands and started shouting "the seas are angry!"
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