just do him I won't tell jon
um i'm guessing you meant to send this to tina, thanks for the support in our relationship you whore
we've reached the level in our friendship where i don't think he would rape me
my 12 year old sister just told me how admirable it was that i felt comfortable going out with my friends dressed "like that"
why is there cat hair all over my deoderant?
she wanted to smell more freshershest than you.
Making pb&j crepes. Using corn tortillas. So high. I don't know if I'm offending French people or Mexican people more.
dude. we need more in our fridge then just beer and applesauce.
Sober me does NOT approve of what went on in my pants last night.
I'm making him come over again tonight. I don't know how long this thing will last so I want to spend as much time with his dick as possible.
There's a bus with a band full of dancing women in bras. I think I like it here.
'TWAS BUT A GLORIOUS SIGHT. BITCHES.
Just set myself on fire a little bit. Made me think of you.
I never thought the most recent texts on my phone would be with ASAP ferg and my ex...
A friendship for the ages born on how horny we both are
Almost ran out to the street bowl in hand when I hear the ice cream truck pull up outside.
Everything about that text makes me proud to be your sister.
You know you have an interesting job when you go to work and have to Google search "How to get poop out of a dryer".
Randomize
