Alarm just got pulled in my exam
Swear it wasn't me
She guessed my name 9 times, and 5 of those times she guessed Mike. Figured that'd be an easy target for the night.
i cant talk right now. we are trying to finish our homework so we can play with play-doh
Just made out with the bride... She was still in her dress & I was still in my bridesmaid dress, how's that for an album picture?!?
I just wanted to hook up with a white guy to prove that i could go back.
I just told you I can't. My fingers are melting. I have discovered the high.
I would not wish his dick upon my worst enemy
She literally just cut half her hair off because she's tired of asking someone to hold it back when shes drunk and puking.
He probably tastes like german chocolate and coffee beans
Seriously though, my ovaries are trying to crawl out of my body and into his pants.
So I've been thinking about this, and I've decided my bed is magic. Every time I change the sheets, a new boy is in my bed. I own the Sheets of Dreams-if I change them, they will come.
This is how baked we were last night. Our drinking game: We stare at each other; first one to laugh drinks.
I understand that just don't try to seduce me while making frozen pizza again.
Plus, I have my cousin, the dominatrix, to help me out if things get out of hand
I feel like you can't break up with someone on 420. It's against stoner code
kick those bitches in the teeth and tell them mama came to party
Randomize
