wow... just woke up to find out that the OJ we used in my bong last night was poured back into the carton
why is pumping your own stomach in your searches on youtube?
She took off her pants and it was like seeing an old friend.
She had a maple leaf tattoo behind her ear and told me she liked my "playoff beard".
Only in Canada would your laziness be applied to hockey and rewarded.
So you actually don't remember giving head to the Neil Armstrong statue last night?
My spanish isn't great but I'm pretty sure he was calling me a "little monkey" while I was blowing him
Only in this snowstorm did have I realized the lengths I'll go to to get laid.
Showed up 2 hours late and still drunk nobody gave me a high five. This intership is bullshit.
pretty sure that drunk girl we saw climbing the stairs is now DJing this club....
Well pretty sure I lost 3 of my best friends in one week. Remember when I said I wasn't sure if I was gonna be a better person or a more despicable one in 2012. Despicable wins.
Mandatory 420 Adventure Time.
This is why we're friends.
IT'S LINGERIE PURCHASED FROM A FLEA MARKET, THE ONLY THING IT'S GOING TO BE POSITIVE FOR IS A TEST FOR HIV
When and where the fuck did we get a beach ball??
I accidentally sent a snap of my puss with the Republican filter... Totally killed his boner
Woke up with a pineapple again... where do i keep on getting these ??
Randomize
