I just blew up the bathroom at work and now I feel like a new woman
i was concerned by what you said you would do for a snickers. It wasn't even a Klondike bar.
a cemetary is a place for people to rest in peace and you just spermed all over their land
not sure what to think.... picked her up and her dad says "if you take her home, you'll regret it"
it was pretty much a given that i would lose my thong on dollar tequilla shot night
he gave me a new purse full of weed and five boxes of samoas for my birthday. best boyfriend ever.
this ms. usa coverage has sucessfully humbled every girl here. depressed fish in a leaky barrel. go!
college stoner meal of the day: microwaved nutrigrain bars
He told me I was a pleasure to arrest. That's the 2nd time I've heard that.
They seemed upset when they walked out and saw a penis in a mouth
You did that scary laugh you always do when you're blacking out except she's never heard it before and though you were choking and screamed at all of us when we didn't call an ambulance
RE-DICK-YOU-LUSSSSS
That's me emphasizing the ridiculous
I have no idea what those words in that order meant, but if you go to Florida send me pics of strippers
Are you in a good mood because I stuffed you with enchiladas, ice cream, penis, and cuddles last night?
A total of 3 guys left my apartment this morning. That was my first clue to my black out endeavors last night. Gotta love wine Wednesdays.
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