We're gonna have to suck it up and start making out for free drinks. No homo. I'm watching Tyra "I kissed a girl and I got free drinks."
Let's do it. All homo
At the bar. Guy comes up wearing a hollister shirt and says "lets blow this popsicle stand"
You fucking left with him didn't you?!
I cant watch the real world now after jersey shore. its like trying to go back to vagina once uve had anal
he belly flopped onto the beer pong table, and almost boke his face, so at that point we decided swimming would be safer for him.
We sat in his closet and drank four loko out of my camelbak for an hour in the dark. You tell me how my night went.
If the world would stop letting me feel invincible I would probably stop doing this shit.
Did i mention i'm like the equivilent of a prepubescent boy suffering from preejaculacy? I just about creamed my pants when he grabbed my hand..
six ambien and a bong later...he was calling me blueberry princess who need rescuing from the evil oven, and he was sir Eatsalot.
he fell asleep like an hour after we got to the beach, he deserved that penis shaped sunburn.
I should put together a new mom basket for her. It would have diapers, vodka, ambien, and tissues for when she cries about her wasted youth.
That's how I like my men: traumatized and crying in a ball
Just a little drinking. So much fun and love. The world is a shiny wonderful sphere in the sky so why shouldn't we celebrate?
woke up between a girl's legs. make your own conclusion.
Just trying to show you I care.
Isn't it supposed to be "what would you like for dinner?" instead of "how do you take your blow?"
Hey, you're the one who asked me to mc to move in.
I’m not washing my pussy with handsoap.
Randomize
