love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
Just remembered throwing your phone at your face in a half-drunk stupor the other morning when your alarm went off. Thought I should apologize.
Good luck! Who knows he might be a stallion in the bedroom! or it could be like having sex with a crayon.
i realized our last day of finals is on cinco de mayo....it's god's way of saying drink ridiculous amounts of tequila and wear sombreros
omg i met someone at the bar who sells hair feathers. that are long. saved in my phone as "haiirs deather"
The chick got into the cab with us and said we have 3 chances to guess what she just stuck up her ass. Hello to you to!
He ripped off my pantyhose and all I could think was, "oh no those were clinic-appropriate!" That's what I get for ditching a continuing education meeting to go hook up with my scuba instructor.
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
So dude comes out in a full body leotard and a wand and announced he's king of the gays. Chicago is a weird but fun place
You wanted to go find him and we told you to sit down cause you kept stumbling. You yelled " I CAN STAND!! It's the walking part I can't figure out!"
Forever getting my life back together in gas station bathrooms.
Hold on, I'm taking nudes in a blanket fort right now
the hot lifeguard just pulled a McDonald's cheeseburger out of her fanny pack.
well, shes hot as hell, but she does keep saying she's the president of the loch ness monster's fan club, so that's kinda a red flag...
So how was it?
The cemetery or the sex?
Randomize
