Raging hang over. 6AM finish. Shat on a bag of trash in an alley. D L that last bit.
I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
Can't remember why I called but it definitely had something to do with Lou Bega
you know what sucks? talking to chicks you dont want to have sex with
you think she would figure it out that ever dude that fucks her is just doing it bc they are in a contest to bang the fattest girl
The mass text at 3:12AM offering "free scrotum tastings" will have repercussions
At least in the future when we're all real people we can laugh about the time we all had scabies together?
Wow. I grabbed the wrong container to rinse my contacts- it was a beer. And it comes out waaaay faster than saline.
Well for number 40 i would prefer to at least like the guy attached to the dick
So neither of us had a dollar bill and we couldnt find a straw so we spent all nite doing coke through penne pasta
"Functional." Your standards for how you feel after drinking are so high.
When your night starts by chugging margarita and drinking vodka out of tupperware, I feel it's best to stay realistic.
I just gave her a sobriety test in the middle of the baking aisle.
And the results, officer?
She's fucked.
You were discovered in a bush, smoking, and singing "in the jungle" to yourself. Which explains the scratches, but not the orange paint.
she fell THROUGH the wall. All in all id have to say that my neighbors where pretty chill about it tho.
As long as there is beach, drink, dick, in that order. I’m in.
Randomize
