ur dog is so gonna tell on us one day.
for doing what?
for smoking bowls out on the deck while your parents aren't home.
my mom heard me say 'don't squirt that at me' while me & him were in my room. She then decided to call my aunt and complain to her that she has the sluttiest daughter in town. she refused to believe me when i told her i was talking about gel.
I'm with your mom on this one.
is it bad if i hope guys are like edward cullen and can read my mind. i could be a whore in disguise.
Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
this morning he rolled over looked at me and said "oooo, you look like i need a drink" and then put on his clothes and left without another word
once the tequila comes in everyone elses feelings go out the window.
Fat spanish girl grinding against air conditioner. ive seen everything now
What I thought it would be sexy pouring melted chocolate down here chest, ended up in second degree burns. Hot food and sex do not mix.
I think they called the cops after 15 minutes of you shaking their clothes line like the ultimate warrior and calling out hulk hogan
we got cut off at 8 am. He spilled his drink three times on the plane. this should be one hell of a vegas trip
Can one of you do me a favor? Light a match and throw it into my room. Bc I'm certain I would rather be burned to death than live in this hell I call my life
im eating mac and cheese with a makeup brush. there is wayyyyy too much wrong with this night.
Why the fuck did I wake up in a chair with mouth clamps?!
It was close. I was the girl scoping out where all the garbage cans were located in the class just in case.
This is why you don't heavily drink before 2 midterms.
Now just crop his dad out and add it to the spank bank.
Randomize
