Its not drinking alone if you got Tiger on the Wii.
a guy in a toll booth on I-90 told me to fuck off for not being a red sox fan. i am going to miss massachusetts very much.
ugh, today is just one of those 'get high before your 8am class' days.
Guess who got arrested for public drunkiness, and called jimmy johns for the entire station last night instead of someone to bail me out? The cop that arrested me drove me home. Win.
i was calling myself "cat the lion" and tried eating the computer mouse because i thought it was "my prey"
I woke up naked dangling by my feet from the balcony over his foyer. He's officially my new favorite booty call.
You convinced her to break up with her boyfriend, made out with her all night, got her to buy us all shots then went home with a different girl...
That explains the "i hate you" text. But the facebook deletion is a bit harsh
She said " I'm going to get her back one day soon for putting extacy in my pop while I drove her to whislter" just a heads up.
I just had nipple jewelry returned to me in the law library.
I knew it was a bad night when the only thing I could remember was you force feeding me tortilla chips as I hugged the tire of my car and begged to have my stomach pumped.
I don't want to go back to the suburbs. Being drunk in public isn't ok and theres too many children. Don't make me.
you never keep up with shots anymore
I'm trying to be more responsible these days
you fucking tried to take your pants off and pee in Taco Bell's parking lot
You need to stop showing people the things i drunk-text to you... i have a reputation to uphold here
It was like if the scent of sour milk and burning tires had a baby in taste form.
Kay so its 9 am whose dumbass is gunna act sober to buy pizza rolls
Dude you promised
Randomize
